#reverb15 // Day 15 // Family ties

I'm joining pals Sarah and Elizabeth to write every day in the month of December, feel free to join in any time! Today's prompt: Family ties. What did family mean to you in 2015?

A little homework for you, readers, before I go into an update on my family story for 2015... the post that I wrote last year on family for #reverb14 - very uplifting indeed. It makes me happy to go back and read that, I still feel the same way this year.

And, more importantly, something very heavy on my mind over the past 2 years - a question I asked of my readers. I got an overwhelmingly positive response for me to just go for it. Reconnect. That post, incidentally, connects way way back to some of the family drama history that I don't have the energy to write about again right now. So if you're interested, go forage on my old site the ksab digest.

This year, I bravely went forward to reconnect with several members of my family that have also been ostracized by my parents, as well as reach back out to family that my parents specifically asked me to end contact with, because they didn't want to be embarrassed about the shameful abomination my life has become. WTF, that is the most rude thing I can possibly think someone could say to you, much less your own parents.

I digress... I figured, screw that! If they are already ashamed of my disgusting lifestyle and want nothing to do with me, why should I give up things that are important to me to please them? Like, the rest of my family. Who, BTW, don't give a single shit that I got divorced and remarried to a woman. Turns out, no one cares except my parents.

Dr. Seuss taught me those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. That is seriously the best single life lesson I have ever learned. Unfortunately, I learned it when I was 30 years old already.

This year, I reached out to several members of my family- two cousins, two aunts- to say hello and to be honest with them about where I've been and what has transpired in my life since the last time we spoke. The responses I got from my cousins were so supportive. One, who lives in PA, I exchange emails with and pictures around the holidays and such - like normal cousins who didn't grow up together actively. The other, who lives here (here!!!!) like 2 miles from my house, listened and understood and we've reconnected like no time has been lost. I did miss out on her two beautiful kids being born, and many other milestones I would have preferred to have shared in with her. But, I am where I am, and she so graciously accepts that about me.

So, I am happy to report that my family is growing! And I feel so good that I have some really great folks on my side of the genetic chain to contribute towards the family that G and I have united with our marriage. Hopefully this is a trend that will continue well into 2016 and beyond.

Me, with my cousin Christine and her husband Will. Good peoples.

#Reflect #reverb15